Friday, September 29, 2006

life without limbs

I learned about a guy named Nick Vujicic this morning. Nick is a young man from Austrailia who was born with no limbs.

Not that something as trivial as having no limbs has stopped him. Nick has dedicated his life to the Lord, and is currently a motivational, Christian speaker who travels all over the world. He is also writing or has just finished a book titled, No Arms, No Legs, No Worries.

On his website he writes,
Sometimes our pain, suffering, anxiety and depression seem so much more real than the promises of God. I share how God turned my life around from a life without limbs to a LIFE WITHOUT LIMITS! God is using me in a mighty way to challenge people to claim the promise of that future and hope. As Proverbs 3:5 says to trust the Lord with all you heart without understanding the circumstances in your life. God is a good God not because of your circumstances, but because God is Faithful and will not leave you!

I love that he has not fallen victim to that lie that would call his condition a punishment for someone's sin, or the act of a mean and angry God that you just have to love anyway.

This is a little more about Nick.



And suddenly all the little stumbling blocks I've ever come up against seem like pebbles.

Wednesday, September 27, 2006

fasting

I think I'm starting to get fasting. I understood it before - I could outline the benefits and give you scripture verses about the need to fast, how to fast, etc. It was still a burden though. I did it becuase I knew it was good for me, and I was pretty sure I'd get it one day, but it sucked - to put it bluntly. I really like food; I tend to eat when I'm bored - fasting does not come naturally to me.

Then I would read things like 2 Corinthians 9:7: "...for God loves a cheerful giver." I know it's talking primarily about finances, but as Christians we give far more than money and I just knew it applied to fasting as well. I would pray and pray - how does one happily give up food? I could fake it, but didn't believe that really counted. How does one respond to the caving of ones stomach with, "Yes! I love that!"??

I got it yesterday - out of no where ... perhaps just a gift for being relatively faithful in the task. I don't know how it happened, but every time temptation presented itself I had this strange attitude that kind of laughed it off with an, "Are you kidding? I'm fasting! I'm drawing close to my Lord and Lover of my soul, and you'd get in the way!" It's cool.

Tuesday, September 26, 2006

pray for pope

Again, I love Muslims - lovely people, really. I like peace, and believe with my whole heart in freedom of religion. Truth does have commentary on each of these topics, though:

1. Jesus said to him, "I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through Me." (John 14:6)

2. But when you hear of wars and rumors of wars, do not be troubled; for such things must happen, but the end is not yet. (Mark 13:7)

3. ...that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, of those in heaven, and of those on earth, and of those under the earth, and that every tongue should confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father. (Phillipians 2:10-11)

I was reading another inspiring story about pope yesterday and the following struck me,
Benedict touched on religion and violence, saying Christians and Muslims “must learn to work together ... to guard against all forms of intolerance and to oppose all manifestations of violence.”

Now, of course, I'm not promoting religious violence, but my first thought was this sarcastic picture of pope and the radical Islamic population standing together to guard the world from Jesus when He returns. Ha. It's funny, but it's not.

Because really, by definition, Jesus can be pretty intolerant. Look at the way he talked to the Pharisees - not very respectful, and I do seem to recall something about his destroying a market that was set up in His Father's house - sounds like their religious convictions were not the same as His. Read through Isaiah - God is constantly telling him, "I alone am God and besides Me there is no other." Doesn't sound very tolerant to me. He's merciful, which is not the same thing, and He's the righteous judge.

Let's not forget, also, He is coming back to first wage war on His enemies. Isaiah 63 is very vivid in that regard.

Again, I'm not promoting violence, because only Jesus is qualified to judge. I am however, encouraging you to get your heart in the right place, make sure you're on the right side before it's too late, and generally: brace yourself, because clearly the church is not ready.

Monday, September 25, 2006

mom

Timothy and I have dinner with my parents on Sunday nights (and do laundry), and it's time I value. This past Sunday something came up that might have taken us away, but for whatever reason we decided to pass and do dinner as usual.

It was a normal Sunday evening at mom and dad's - dinner and sitting around. At one point, mom made a comment about how nice it would be to get one night's sleep. I pressed the point a bit and she told us her neck and shoulders have been bothering her, and once she wakes up she lays awake thinking/worrying. She didn't say what she worries about, but the woman has this uncanny ability to worry about anything. Immediately I heard Holy Spirit, "Pray over her." I responded, "I will."

Something about my parents inspires this uncharacteristic timidity in me. I don't know what it is, but I've always been very non-confrontational toward them. Although lately I've been much, much better.

For the remaining hour of the evening Holy Spirit would remind me, "You are going to pray, right?" "Don't forget to pray before you leave." I actually answered out loud while I was alone in the basement, pulling laundry out of the dryer, "Yes! I will pray."

So as we discussed getting off the couches to go - and mom to go to bed - I turned to her, "Mom, can we pray with you before we go - for the shoulder and the not sleeping?" She laughed uncomfortably and consented, and Timothy echoed, "Ya, I really felt to pray with you too." We each laid a hand on her shoulders; prayed very simply for healing, sleep, and peace of mind; and gave hugs. She made a comment about us having "hot little hands" (which is funny because I was freezing) that I think she knew meant more than body heat.

Hallelujah that He gives us the words to speak in that hour. In retrospect, I realized I said, "pray for you," not "over you," which might have been oddly authoritative for mom. I was also acutely aware that I should not pray in tongues, though it's my natural reaction to do so - for mom it would have been very uncomfortable and no one should be uncomfortable if she's being prayed over.

On the way home, Timothy told me he'd felt the clear conviction to pray the same time I did, and that he did feel a heat moving through his hand. Awesome. I believe with all my heart she woke up rested and well this morning - anyway it's Jesus' name on the line, not mine!

Wednesday, September 20, 2006

evil and inhumane


Stop! Everybody just stop. This is stupid. Pope makes a comment about Muhammad's teachings being "evil and inhumane," and now Muslim's all over the world are waging a war on the west and other "worshippers of the cross?" Excuse me, now? This war is just beginning now? Give me a break. (If you're nodding a blank visage right now, check out the Honest Reporting link to the right, or go here.)

I know I'm just a kafir with a limited knowledge of Islam, but can I make two small observations here (besides the above)?

1. Why do I not hear a Muslim voice denying Muhammad's command to "spread by the sword the faith?" My primitive, western mind translates that, "intimidate by threat of death in order to convert people to Islam." To me, that's evil and inhumane, but all I'm hearing is "I'm offended," not "That's not true."

2. Why is it that every time the Muslim world is insulted by unreasonable claims regarding the violent nature of Islam, the loudest response is a group of fundamental Islamists rioting, bombing and declaring war? I mean if I'm mad because someone thinks I'm voilent - and I'm really not - do I punch that person in the face to prove him wrong?

I love Muslims, and I know there are many, many, many who are peaceful and against jihad - but where are you?

The thing that really gets me is today's headline: Pope Expresses 'Deep Respect' for Islam? The man's totally back-peddaling and it's weak sauce. It is possible to respect Muslim people without respecting Islam. And then he makes the comment that now he's looking for, "positive, even self-critical dialogue both among religions and between modern reason and Christian faith." Dialogue between modern reason and Christian faith? What does that even mean?

I'd like to dialogue with all the peace-loving Muslims out there - we can have tea and talk about the woes of being misrepresented to the world.

Tuesday, September 19, 2006

skee ball and bad pizza


Last night we celebrated my birthday (again) with a few friends at Chuck E Cheese: pizza and skee ball - what else do you need to turn 23?

Bianca went way over board. She brought balloons and streamers, which she immediately began decorating the table with, as well as a german chocolate up-side-down cake. Tim and Marianne brought a tiara.

Chuck E Cheese pizza has come a long way, but not long enough that my tummy wasn't a bit angry with me this morning (nothing a little prayer and repentence can't move along). I think the pizza sauce had more sugar in it than the cake.

We spent a few hours eating poorly and everyone spent $5 on skee ball and photo machines and random video games. Little Goldilocks (Bella) came with as well, and entertained us when the flashing lights and loud music failed. All in all a successful evening.

Monday, September 18, 2006

forming a youth brigade

Friday nights are my favorites. It's awesome to see the Lord working in the hearts, minds and lives of the teenagers who come out for our youth meetings. India was cool, but the Lord is using us in greater ways on Friday nights in Elgin, Illinois. Signs and wonders like we saw this summer only advertise, only confirm the fact of the gospel message, but the encounter that takes place at the end of every week is the truth of Jesus Christ being written on young hearts.

It's exciting to see it happening so early in their lives. I wasted my teenage years, but these kids are already starting to get a hold of what's True. If they only cultivate the courage to stick with Him, they're going to do serious damage to satan's domain.

We had another great service this past Friday with a message on renewing the mind. A lot of kids came forward for prayer toward the end of the evening, many in tears, and I'm confident that many now live in a new level of freedom. Freedom from the things the world pushes at them and on them day after day after day. I think it's easy for adults to trivialize the social pressure that a lot of teenagers are under because we think we see more clearly now that we're older and we've experienced some of the "real" world. I think it's easier the older one gets, because the older one gets the less of a target she becomes for the kingdom of media.

These kids have my heart and I wish there was more I could do or pray or sing to help them get it, to make sure it sticks, to encourage them to go deeper ... but I don't have to, I guess, because as long as we pray, He will.

Friday, September 15, 2006

smiles

My buddy, Michael, went to Wisconsin last weekend for an anniversary/reunion thing. Last night he was talking a bit about people he hadn't seen in a while, etc. and mentioned someone's new baby.

The boy is - I think - six months old. Michael was telling us that this kid would smile really big when you looked at him, and then if you looked away his countenance kind of fell a bit. (It was great b/c Michael was re-enacting the six-month-old facial expressions as best he could.) He said it was amazing, and he didn't believe the kid was doing it at first so he'd look at him and look away and look at him and look away.

I was thinking about that story on the way to work this morning, and the thought came to my mind: how much more does our Father smile when we turn our faces toward Him? And when we turn away, how much more does He wait for us to look His way again?
I got the impression, from Michael's story, that there wasn't one time when he looked at this baby and the baby didn't smile - how much more is our Abba always happy to see our eyes on Him?

On a side note, this was on Brian's blog the other day and I love it:

Thursday, September 14, 2006

tick ... tock ... tick ... tock ...

Today's my birthday. I'm 23. I'm 23 and I feel like I'm falling behind. I feel like there are bigger, better things that should be evidenced in my life right now that are not. I feel like I should know the Lord better - I should recognize His voice in a crowd; I should be more confident in my position beneath His blood.

Jacob came home for a visit from IHOP KC not too very long ago and we sat in Eileen's kitchen for hours talking about the things of the Lord. He told me of a young woman he knows who disappeared - withdrawn in prayer - for days, finally emerging as though from a war. She said Jesus met her in her room a few night prior (with some symbolically significant things in His hands, I don't remember what) and told her she's late. Late! I don't want my encounter with the risen Christ to be out of the necessity that He motivate me like that!

I feel like He already is though, and I'm running out of time to make up. I need to "seek the Lord while He may be found" (Isaiah 55:6), because the charge itself implies that there is a time when He may not be found! I know the time is nearly upon us when even, if possible, the elect will be decieved (Mark 21:22)! If even the elect, how much more me? If even the elect, what's one hour a day to be in His presence?!
It's nothing ... it's a lunch break. I spend about as much time with Him every day as I do on a tuna salad sandwich and a cherry coke.

Lord, forgive me. Forgive me for forgetting who You are. Forgive me for being so prideful as to think that getting up one hour early in the morning is enough for all I need of You. Help me to make time, Holy Spirit. Help me to plan my days around You and not You into my day. Help these be more than vain words...

Tuesday, September 12, 2006

Dirty

Sometimes I think I'm so full of envy and strife that it's a wonder I don't just fall down dead. It's a wonder I get anything done, or that I'm allowed to minister under a CITW banner. There are days when I feel like it's about to consume me and I'll never speak a word of wisdom, never lay hands on the sick ever again - because how could the Lord use so rotten a creature?

I know He can, though, and that He will, that He does it because He is Love and that even though I'm disgusting He smiles over me. I've reminded Him of the blood of His Son several times over the past two days ... or reminded myself. It's so hard sometimes to remember that He considers me lovely today.
Me. Today. Even though I have next to no real vision for my life, almost zero passion for the One who burns for me. Even though I slept through our date this morning because I was up late watching a movie last night. He chuckles as He wipes the mud from my face.

Who can be against me? Not even me.

Monday, September 11, 2006

Yes!

I know that's a non-descript title, but it's the common denominator between two short things:

Worship at our youth meeting on Friday night was wonderful. We had fun - and I mean everyone, not just the worship team - and the Holy Spirit was manifest among us. It's so good, after prayer and more prayer, to see a break through like that, and to get to lead a small group of teenagers into the joy of their Lord. Even the new kids were jumping around. It's worth all the spiritual labor, it really is. Lord, I pray that service put an expectancy in their hearts that will never be discouraged!

On a different (but not totally unrelated) note, read Brian's blog from Saturday. It's tres bon.

Friday, September 08, 2006

Wanted:

I am struggling with our youth worship ministry, and it's starting to just get annoying.

We need to have a repetoire of more than five songs, but new songs are so hard to find. Where are all the good worship teams lead by women? And how do I get their lead sheets? All the kids want to do is Hillsong United, and I love United but I'd like to do more. There has to be more good worship music out there - not to mention most of their vocalists are men and sing out of my range. I admit I'm picky about songs (the lyrics need to be encouraging and Biblical, the music should be good and mostly upbeat), but I'm not unreasonable.

My only option, then is to write my own, and I don't know if it keeps coming to mind because I can't find another way out or because I'm being prompted. I think I have it in me, but I have no time to sit in front of my piano and mull over lyrics and chords. I've tried to think about lyrics while I'm doing other stuff, but my mind's relatively engaged all day in percents and dollar signs. Then I end up with a chorus that stands alone forever because I can't get around to putting the rest of a song around it. Ugh.

But, in other news, He met me again. The long wait is over - hallelujah. He must have known the frustration mixed with boredom was about to become toxic, and stepped in just in time to save the day. Knowing that I can quietly request His presence at any time is getting me through right now.
He's the bread of life, after all; that's all I need.

Wednesday, September 06, 2006

mom hen

When you're involved in someone else's life, it's easy to get attached. When you're ministering, and regularly sowing into someone else's life, it's almost impossible not to. There's something about a worship team that feels so much like family it's amazing.

We had practice yesterday evening with our Switch (youth) worship team. Not long into it, I looked up toward the back of the room and Tami - our Sunday morning worship nazi ... I mean leader - was watching with her head and pregnant belly in the slightly open door. (During the first song, so my voice wasn't warmed up and I probably sounded awful.) Tami's cute anyway, but she's especially cute in that she has this mother-hen thing about the worship team. It's not surprising, given all the time and energy and prayer and faith that she spends on each of us.


Last night at shortly after 11pm, one of my little worship team chicks (as in baby chicken) called with what could have been an emergency. He was trying really hard, and doing really well, at holding himself together, but was clearly upset. We prayed together on the phone, and Timothy and I prayed again after we hung up ... then I prayed in tongues until I fell asleep. I was confident the situation would be fine - because all things work together for good to those who love God (Romans 8:28) - but I wanted my worshipper to know that, to be comforted, to trust our Lord and to sleep well.

"...that their hearts may be encouraged, being knit together in love..." Colossians 2:2a

Tuesday, September 05, 2006

the false prophet?

Check this out. Newsweek actually ran an article on the false prophet who will rise up to prepare the world to recieve the anitchrist when he comes. Read the article, seriously, it's creepy.

The article starts describing the spirit behind this man, and how it has tried to manifest in various people over the years. "He is the Man who promises Arabs honor instead of shame, victory instead of defeat, empowerment instead of subjugation." The author outlines almost prophetically the mentality that will one day allow for his overwhelming influence, and how this new guy - Hassan Nasrallah - might finally fulfill the role that so many have been defeated in before.

"The fervent support that Hizbullah enjoys will grow with a ceasefire and diplomatic settlement that sees Israel leave occupied Lebanese lands. Almost overnight, Nasrallah will have produced what three generations of ordinary Arabs have yearned for: military effectiveness instead of haplessness; political empowerment instead of marginalization; resistance instead of forced submission to Israeli-American threats."

Interesting. The thing that gets me, though, is the list of people who have risen up under this same spirit and failed over the past 50 years. This should encourage the church in corporate prayer. We know that the key points of these last days are clearly outlined in Biblical prophecy, but we need to remember all the details that are not and pray to their ends. I'm convinced that the only reason Gamal Abdel Nasser or Ayatollah Khomeini didn't come to embody the fulness of the spirit of the false prophet - the only reason the antichrist is not, now, at the height of his rage - is because of the prayers of the saints and the warfare the church has waged for decades.
Be encouraged - your prayers are heard, your prayers move heaven, your prayers are needed.

Friday, September 01, 2006

Musing

The scripture verse that's taped to my monitor today is 1 Corinthians 1:25, "Because the foolishness of God is wiser than men, and the weakness of God is stronger than men." I read that this morning and paused for a moment over "the weakness of God."

In India I gave a message to 800 stoic, steeped-in-tradition Indian teenagers and young adults on the burning, violently passionate heart of God. At one point I was trying to paint the picture of a mighty King whose enemies tremble before Him because He never loses a battle, the guy every man wants to be, who somehow gets butterflies in His stomach over this one particular woman. The point being, of course, that Christ is that King and you are that woman (even if you're a man - it's symbolism, come on). After I'd tried to build up the image of the Man that no one can beat or even touch, whom no one can figure out, with no apparent fine print or catch or weakness I mentioned His bride again and told them, "You are his weakness! You are the thing that softens the heart of the King of kings!"

My intent was not to imply, of course, that God is weak, or that the affection He created a person out of and for will in any way sway His ultimate ruling as the Righteous Judge. My husband pointed out that evening, though, that I hadn't attached that disclaimer during the message. The Lord knows I wasn't calling Him weak, and I petitioned forgiveness if I led anyone to that end.

Then I read 1 Corinthians 1:25 this morning and thought, "Even if I had called Him weak, his weakness is stronger than our strength." If there was any truth in my previous oration, then, His love for you is stronger than you.
There's nothing you can do or say or think or believe that would convince Him to not love you. His love for you is stronger than you.