I'm leaving for two weeks - I've been busy.
On a side note, before I get back to our main theme, here, I had an amazing time with my little brother on Friday. We went out to lunch so I could hang out before I left and it was just wonderful. I won't go into all the glorious details, but I just know that he knows there's more out there for him. He's too smart to really believe pot and tattoos is his portion forever. If you can, please keep him in your prayers.
The team spent ten hours together yesterday preparing. Most of the time was learning dramas, which are amazing. The main one we'll be doing is called Freedom and if you've ever seen it you know it's amazing. Just watching the DVD before we blocked it out was powerful - it hit so close to home I got choked up. It's about a girl who goes through everything trying to find the thing that will make her happy for real; over and over again she turns away from Christ to try the things of the world and every time they hurt her. I admit I was a little jealous to play the role of that girl, but I know if I obey my leadership I'm in His will and I'm becoming convinced I have at least a decent grasp on the malice controling a demon (that's my role - I'm a greed demon) because they manipulated me for so long. (Forgive the run-on sentence.) It's going to be interesting.
Sunday, July 30, 2006
Thursday, July 27, 2006
... Four ...
I think my mind is being renewed regarding this trip. I find that when I pray about it, or just think about it even in passing, it's almost like it's business. In a tough-guy-starring-in-a-'90s-action-movie sort of way, but not at all cheesy because there's nothing cheesy about my God. I'm excited and I know it's going to be fun, but at the same time it's like I'm being prepared to take no prisoners. I'm anticipating powerful things, and I'm nearly to the point of spiritual violence over it. (I say "nearly" because I know there's a level of spiritual violence I haven't even dreamed of yet.) At the rate I'm going, in four more days I may be ... I hope I'll be ready to pick a fight.
In the natural, Timothy took a turn for the worse yesterday with that bug he's fighting. This morning saw a renewed strength, though, so he'll be fine by take-off.
In the natural, Timothy took a turn for the worse yesterday with that bug he's fighting. This morning saw a renewed strength, though, so he'll be fine by take-off.
Wednesday, July 26, 2006
... Five ...
I'm starting to notice my ideas changing about what this work in India is going to be. In my prayer time and just in passing thought, anticipating the events soon to come, I catch myself relating to the thing as a serious battle. I say "catch myself" because it's not a mind set I'm trying actively to cultivate, it's just there. Hmm.
In the meantime we continue to be blessed beyond measure. The nearly $2000 balance on our trip has been covered by two generous donors. I pray a double-blessing on their families! The next day the guy in Oklahoma that Timothy's been trying to haggle with over his dream bass guitar emails and offers an amazing deal - and we don't even have to pay it all up front. He doesn't know us, but he's willing to send the bass and trust that we'll pay it off when we're able.
In the meantime we continue to be blessed beyond measure. The nearly $2000 balance on our trip has been covered by two generous donors. I pray a double-blessing on their families! The next day the guy in Oklahoma that Timothy's been trying to haggle with over his dream bass guitar emails and offers an amazing deal - and we don't even have to pay it all up front. He doesn't know us, but he's willing to send the bass and trust that we'll pay it off when we're able.
Tuesday, July 25, 2006
... Six ...
Naturally, everything gets more intense the closer one gets to launch time. Finances are going to be extremely tight between bills before we leave and paying off the balance on the trip itself. Time is becoming elusive; we're adjusting things and canceling things to try to find time to put together this packing list. Last night Timothy got hit with a sore throat and a bit of congestion - which doesn't surprise us in the least. And we haven't even left, but we're already learning new things about submitting and obedience.
Monday, July 24, 2006
The Countdown Begins
We leave for Kurnool, India one week from today. I've gone back and forth between being excited and nervous, and now I'm just looking forward to two weeks with my Lord. Two weeks I don't have to take hours out of my day to put together client portfolios and all the rest.
I was talking with our youth pastor, who just got back from Mexico with the Jr. High kids, about how it hits them when everything else they're used to is taken away and they're just there with Jesus. My spirit got excited. Please take everything else away, I don't want it and it's always in the way. I can't wait.
In the meantime we'll be busy gathering things like sandals and deet and old sheets. Please remember us when you're with Him; I covet your prayers.
I was talking with our youth pastor, who just got back from Mexico with the Jr. High kids, about how it hits them when everything else they're used to is taken away and they're just there with Jesus. My spirit got excited. Please take everything else away, I don't want it and it's always in the way. I can't wait.
In the meantime we'll be busy gathering things like sandals and deet and old sheets. Please remember us when you're with Him; I covet your prayers.
Tuesday, July 18, 2006
The Lamb
I went home last night and made tea and found John 1 because I missed Jesus. I got to verse 29, "The next day John saw Jesus coming toward him, and said, 'Behold! The Lamb of God who takes away the sin of the world!" And I cried.
Monday, July 17, 2006
Poop
So it's been a while.
And I have nothing to say. I'm tired.
I loath the contents of my weekdays between 8 and 5, but at the same time if this is where the Lord has me I should rejoice b/c He knows best, right? Forgive me, but I just can't right now.
I consider myself vile for how much I've neglected Him this week. It's like the days are over in minutes and I'm exhausted and I don't know where it all went or
what it yielded. I don't even try to recollect anymore because usually it's nothing, and that's just depressing. I've completely slacked off on my early morning prayer time, and the one time I tried it was like I had nothing to say. I can sit at work and make a list five miles long of people and countries and ministries and errors in my own soul to pray for and then I bring myself before Him and it becomes dry, rote religion. I can't even do that really romantic, coming-back-to-my-first-love thing and bask in His glory and goodness and beauty because I fall asleep waiting for Him. Just like the disciples in the garden; I guess I don't get it either. I haven't had a good meal in a week and all that's happened is my stomach's shrunk.
Jay told me this would happen.
And I have nothing to say. I'm tired.
I loath the contents of my weekdays between 8 and 5, but at the same time if this is where the Lord has me I should rejoice b/c He knows best, right? Forgive me, but I just can't right now.
I consider myself vile for how much I've neglected Him this week. It's like the days are over in minutes and I'm exhausted and I don't know where it all went or
what it yielded. I don't even try to recollect anymore because usually it's nothing, and that's just depressing. I've completely slacked off on my early morning prayer time, and the one time I tried it was like I had nothing to say. I can sit at work and make a list five miles long of people and countries and ministries and errors in my own soul to pray for and then I bring myself before Him and it becomes dry, rote religion. I can't even do that really romantic, coming-back-to-my-first-love thing and bask in His glory and goodness and beauty because I fall asleep waiting for Him. Just like the disciples in the garden; I guess I don't get it either. I haven't had a good meal in a week and all that's happened is my stomach's shrunk. Jay told me this would happen.
Tuesday, July 11, 2006
The Author
I forget sometimes that God is an author - and a best selling author at that. If anyone knows metaphor, personification, allusion, etc it's the Lord.
With that understanding these past few weeks, I've found the world much more interesting. It's not cheesy or over-analytical to consider the odd little things we encounter day to day, because as Christians we have the assurance that Christ is directing our paths. There's not a moment of the day that He forgets you because He's working with someone else. When I'm having a rough day and I glance down at my feet in time to notice a sole ant dragging a dead caterpillar across the sidewalk, I know that the Holy Spirit sees it to and we chuckle at it together.
It's also pretty easy to let our society convince us, on some subconsious level that we don't always see right away, that God is haughty, or arrogant, or stoic, or boring, or all of the above. If God didn't have a sense of humor, there would be no laughter; if God weren't playful, there would be no weekends.
That makes things not only more interesting, but way more fun. A few nights ago the Lord knew someone was planning a fireworks display, and He beat them to the punch. We stood out on a friend's back porch to watch the most amazing symphony of heat lighting I've ever seen, and perhaps 10 minutes into it the fireworks started. It was so embarassing we laughed, and I'm sure that's what He was going for. He's a Father who likes to show off in front of his children who love Him.
With that understanding these past few weeks, I've found the world much more interesting. It's not cheesy or over-analytical to consider the odd little things we encounter day to day, because as Christians we have the assurance that Christ is directing our paths. There's not a moment of the day that He forgets you because He's working with someone else. When I'm having a rough day and I glance down at my feet in time to notice a sole ant dragging a dead caterpillar across the sidewalk, I know that the Holy Spirit sees it to and we chuckle at it together.
It's also pretty easy to let our society convince us, on some subconsious level that we don't always see right away, that God is haughty, or arrogant, or stoic, or boring, or all of the above. If God didn't have a sense of humor, there would be no laughter; if God weren't playful, there would be no weekends.
That makes things not only more interesting, but way more fun. A few nights ago the Lord knew someone was planning a fireworks display, and He beat them to the punch. We stood out on a friend's back porch to watch the most amazing symphony of heat lighting I've ever seen, and perhaps 10 minutes into it the fireworks started. It was so embarassing we laughed, and I'm sure that's what He was going for. He's a Father who likes to show off in front of his children who love Him.
Thursday, July 06, 2006
Worship and Prayer
I got a piano. My very own piano. It's electric, but man is it beautiful. And it sounds amazing. I got a smashing deal on the thing too; the boss called it an "ex-employee discount."
Music's really coming to the fore-front lately. I suddenly want to write songs, which sounds like some cliche thing that anyone who has really been in music for over a decade would say. Every musician wants to write music, right? Faux. I was classically trained for eight years and that will intimidate you right out of attempting to write music. They don't even call it "writing music," it's "composing." Who am I to compose? Jeeze. I want to now though, and it's bugging me because I've never wanted to write music before and I don't want to disappoint myself. I know that's the wrong thing to say on so many levels, but that's where I'm at right now so if you cringed just then, pray for me.
A woman in my office was telling us this morning about her granddaughter who wrote the lyrics to this beautiful song that some major artist picked up. She played the song and everyone knew it but me (it's a secular song). I just got annoyed that someone with such a gift would waste it on everything that's falling away. I haven't actually sat down and made any real attempt to write a song, though, so it's like my flesh just wants to be jealous because that's the artistic angst thing to do and blah blah.
Part of me hestitates too because I don't feel qualified to write worship music. I listen to some of these beautiful, inspiring songs and think, "Wow. My heart is so not in that place." I wonder if I'm passionate enough for a good piece to flow out of me. I guess you'd tell me, though, that the Holy Spirit is plenty passionate and if I just let Him write I'm okay. You're good council.
The Harp & Bowl's been divine too. We actually had people come after the service last night, just for Harp & Bowl. One woman was telling us afterward about how she's been struggling in worship lately. That feeling of always having to press in to engage in worship had been overwhelming, but last night she used the term "sweet Spirit" more than once to describe the atmosphere.
Worship and prayer and worship and prayer and prayer and worship. It's almost like I'm practicing ... or training for something. Hmm.
Music's really coming to the fore-front lately. I suddenly want to write songs, which sounds like some cliche thing that anyone who has really been in music for over a decade would say. Every musician wants to write music, right? Faux. I was classically trained for eight years and that will intimidate you right out of attempting to write music. They don't even call it "writing music," it's "composing." Who am I to compose? Jeeze. I want to now though, and it's bugging me because I've never wanted to write music before and I don't want to disappoint myself. I know that's the wrong thing to say on so many levels, but that's where I'm at right now so if you cringed just then, pray for me.
A woman in my office was telling us this morning about her granddaughter who wrote the lyrics to this beautiful song that some major artist picked up. She played the song and everyone knew it but me (it's a secular song). I just got annoyed that someone with such a gift would waste it on everything that's falling away. I haven't actually sat down and made any real attempt to write a song, though, so it's like my flesh just wants to be jealous because that's the artistic angst thing to do and blah blah.
Part of me hestitates too because I don't feel qualified to write worship music. I listen to some of these beautiful, inspiring songs and think, "Wow. My heart is so not in that place." I wonder if I'm passionate enough for a good piece to flow out of me. I guess you'd tell me, though, that the Holy Spirit is plenty passionate and if I just let Him write I'm okay. You're good council.
The Harp & Bowl's been divine too. We actually had people come after the service last night, just for Harp & Bowl. One woman was telling us afterward about how she's been struggling in worship lately. That feeling of always having to press in to engage in worship had been overwhelming, but last night she used the term "sweet Spirit" more than once to describe the atmosphere.
Worship and prayer and worship and prayer and prayer and worship. It's almost like I'm practicing ... or training for something. Hmm.
Monday, July 03, 2006
Busy, Busy
There's so much going on it's crazy.
The Jr. High kids left for Mexico Saturday morning. Most of them called home Sunday and all of their parents told me about it at the church picnic that afternoon. Everyone's well. They were still in Texas, waiting to jump the border and save souls.
We've had about a half dozen kids/teenagers in the past two weeks dropping everything and looking for Christ (again, in some cases). Every day I hear of a kid who left youth group and had been doing drugs who decided it was all garbage and he's coming back. Or a guy who's never been to church before putting down the alcohol because he can't pull himself away from his new Bible. It's phenomenal - Jesus is on the move.
I think personally I'm at a point where I may have to take a step back from something - although I don't know what. It seems I've cut out all the simpler things and I'm still just tired all the time. Being a full time employee, a full time wife, doing a full time ministry, and trying desperately to pursue a real relationship with the Son of God is exhausting. Or maybe I haven't figured out how to effectively budget my time - although goodness knows I'm trying.
So that's a brief update. I hadn't posted in a while because things at work have been so busy that even my lunch breaks are consumed, so I wanted to throw up something for the out-of-towners who may been reading.
Love you all.
The Jr. High kids left for Mexico Saturday morning. Most of them called home Sunday and all of their parents told me about it at the church picnic that afternoon. Everyone's well. They were still in Texas, waiting to jump the border and save souls.
We've had about a half dozen kids/teenagers in the past two weeks dropping everything and looking for Christ (again, in some cases). Every day I hear of a kid who left youth group and had been doing drugs who decided it was all garbage and he's coming back. Or a guy who's never been to church before putting down the alcohol because he can't pull himself away from his new Bible. It's phenomenal - Jesus is on the move.
I think personally I'm at a point where I may have to take a step back from something - although I don't know what. It seems I've cut out all the simpler things and I'm still just tired all the time. Being a full time employee, a full time wife, doing a full time ministry, and trying desperately to pursue a real relationship with the Son of God is exhausting. Or maybe I haven't figured out how to effectively budget my time - although goodness knows I'm trying.
So that's a brief update. I hadn't posted in a while because things at work have been so busy that even my lunch breaks are consumed, so I wanted to throw up something for the out-of-towners who may been reading.
Love you all.
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