Wednesday, May 28, 2008

pursue Me

I sat on stage last Friday night violently aware of the lights on my face. With my head down just so the short bill on my hat would cast a shadow, but somehow I still felt the cold lights on my eyelids. Because maybe if I didn't look at them they'd just go away.

Three quarters of the way through our worship time I didn't feel God; I felt boredom. I'm tired of boredom. I'm tired of every worship song being the same, every worship set being the same, every Friday night and Sunday morning being the same. I'm ready for the next thing. I'm ready for more. Lord, what am I doing wrong that we're stuck in this place?

Pursue Me.

It wasn't a command, just a gentle suggestion whispered quietly within my spirit.

Pursue Me.

So I gave it voice. The more I spoke it, the louder it grew inside me. I don't know if I was talking to the students or just to myself, but it got louder and louder and not urgent - but desperate? At some point in my spontaneous discourse Pursue Me went from a suggestion to a plea.

Pursue Me. Not because I need you to, but because you need you to. You need to. There is nothing out there for you. The world has nothing for you. Pursue Me. I'm not easy. I am not cheap. I am not simple or quick because I am not of the world. Pursue Me. I give you rest. I am your peace. I go before you. I am your breath. I am your heartbeat. I am your romance, your fantasy, and your adventure. I AM. Pursue Me. Pursue Me. Pursue Me.

1 comment:

God's Love Changed Everything said...


thank God you gave voice to it.

i will choose to respond to my Love. i will pursue.

peace, sister