randomness 'cause my brain is fried

First some videos.

This one just cracks me up. I still despise Verizon, but this is funny.




There are a tone of these here. Check out the street preacher one. It's hilarious.



What can I say? Mainstream marketing is going gorilla and they're good at it.



Finally, a trailer for a movie about a graffiti artist. I'm interested.



And - because I know you're curious - here are some of the random thoughts that are floating around in my brain:

One. I think Obama is the false prophet. I don't think he has it in him/meets the requirements to be the complete incarnation of the antichrist spirit that's going to wreak havoc here in a bit, but I tell you what: When that man has some sort of spiritual awakening and starts following a charistmatic religious leader who can work lying signs and wonders ... everyone will follow. I'm only partly kidding.

Two. The answer, for the last time, is Sin. For goodness sake. I've come across so many articles/blog posts/comment wars just in the past week about people losing their faith because they were exposed to corruption in the Church. Or because they just couldn't get over tens of thousands of children orphaned by AIDS. Why? How? (I'm being very melodramatic in my head right now.) Yes, those things are terrible, and not Christ-like, and the rest of us Christians disagree whole-heartedly.

But come on, you lost your faith because of it? Because of people? You lost your faith in an uncreated, beautiful, self-sacrificing, humble God because some very created, finite, horrible people happen to know of the same God? Knock it off. 'Cause if that's how we're going to play, I no longer believe in the U.S. government. Or our armed forces. Or local business, 'cause my husband had a run-in with a really rude bicycle repair shop owner last week. So now I will no longer ride my bike - despite the sense of freedom and the joy - because of the err of someone associated with bicycles.

Give me a break. And I realize I'm being kind of callous here, but I've heard/read it a dozen times in the past few days and it's really starting to irritate me. It's sin. People sin. People abuse children, share needles, have sex outside of marriage, etc. It's not God's fault. It's people's fault. Lose your faith in people, that makes more sense.

And you know, on the one hand we blame God for all of the stupid things that people do, but on the other hand we seem to get a kick out of rejecting God because "Christianity is all about rules." Christianity is not all about rules, but there are rules. And there are rules so that children don't get abused and so people don't die of AIDS.

It's sin. Freakin' stop it already.

Three. Twitter, if you haven't heard me say this before, is rad and weird. You know that earthquake in LA the other day? I knew about it at least 13 minutes before you did. Because I have Tweople in CA.

Just sitting at my desk and my TwitterFox box started going crazy with "Earthquake!" "That was a huge earthquake!" If you searched Twitter for "earthquake" in those 13 minutes, you would get a results page of the most recent 25 or so. By the time you scrolled to the bottom of the page (and we're talking about 25, 140-character-at-most messages) there would be a small box at the top telling you, "There have been 1024 new Tweets matching your results since you searched. Would you like to refresh?"

By the time CNN had any info up about the magnitude or the 2.8 after-shock it was old news.

That's cool. And that's weird. Welcome to the digital revolution.

worthy?

I've been reading First and Second Thessalonians over and over and over the past several days (and on and off for the past several weeks). I heard a teaching once - years ago - that challenged the audience to pick an epistle and read it every day for a month. I did it first with Philippians and wow. I highly recommend it, but this is about Thessalonians.

Usually the process starts to get boring around day four, which is where I can slip into "on and off" for a week or so. I'm past that with the Thess' now, and have moved into being completely blown away by the concept of suffering for the kingdom of God.

Most, if not all, of the early Church suffered for the name of Jesus, but from these two short letters, it's obvious that the Thess' suffered more persecution and tribulation than most of the others. What's really agonizing my soul, though, is the way Paul talks about it.

In 1 Thessalonians 2 (v. 13 -) Paul commends them in that when they heard the gospel, they received it as the word of God, and not the word of men. They believed that what they were hearing was of/from God, and how does Paul know? Because they did what other faithful churches did, and opened themselves to persecution for the Lord's name. Verse 14 starts "For you, brethren ..." They allowed the word of God to so work in their hearts that it incited their fellow countrymen to violence against them; violence that they persevered through instead of running from.

In 2 Thessalonians 1, Paul encourages their "patience and faith" through all the trials and persecutions, calling it "manifest evidence of the righteous judgment of God." Their endurance was manifest evidence of the righteousness of God, because it means they were found worthy to suffer for the kingdom, because "it is a righteous thing with God to repay with tribulation those who trouble you."

A couple verses later, Paul says they pray always that the Thessalonian church would be found worthy of that calling. When I think about being counted worthy, I tend to think about things like spending a lot of time in prayer, or giving to the Church or overseas missions. I don't think about being persecuted, but I think it's part of my mind that still needs to be renewed.

Jesus said, "Blessed are you when they persecute you." In Acts 5, the apostles leave the council excited that they had been "counted worthy" to suffer for Christ. I know the principle is there, and I believe it's coming to the Church in the West, but am I ready? Am I worthy?

And if enduring persecution is a sign that I've received the Word of God properly, and evidence of God's righteousness, what's the opposite? If persecution does come to our society, and I manage to evade it, I am not worthy of the Kingdom.

John 15:20/Remember the words I spoke to you: 'No servant is greater than his master.' If they persecuted me, they will persecute you also.

party at my place

It was a sleepy, Sunday afternoon. The way Sunday afternoons in July can tend to be. We got home from church. Timothy and I put jeans on. We put some of the groceries away. Two and I shared a pizza. We laid around: incapacitated by warm.

Timothy moved the laying around party to the bedroom, where there's at least a ceiling fan, by way of moving himself to the bedroom. Two and I soon followed and somehow, for some reason, the smack talk began.

"I will drop you, old man."

"Two, I'm laying down."

"Then I will pick you up and drop you."

Wisdom told me to remove myself from - literally - the middle of it, and just in time.

What followed, on the two-year-old IKEA bed, was what some may consider masculinity at it's finest - or most typical. With the pungent odor of testosterone thick in the air, Two made good on his promise to pick Timothy up and - from his knees - drop him.

The center support beam in the bed, however, also dropped. Manhood retreated for a moment as two, boyish grins turned my way - one from the edge of the bed and one from the canyon where the mattress once rested - begging, "This is funny, right?"

Given the shocked expressions where, in hindsight, there really shouldn't have been any, I had to admit that it was. And we did what three reasonable, responsible young adults should do when they've done something completely stupid that requires quick attention: We went to visit a friend at work for tea and cookies.

making humility difficult

Yes, yes, it's been a week and a half but I'm a busy lady, alright? I've been meaning to blog/brag on hanging out with Bianca in SC, so I'm going to do it and I don't care how tardy it is.

This lady is awesome. You probably know that, but she's more awesome now than she was when she moved away a year ago. I know, I know: it sounds totally impossible, but it's true.

We went over to Jeff and Bianca's for dinner one evening during our vacation. Lovely evening with another adorable couple they go to church with (and their Baby Simon who is adorable). Before dinner, the womens were standing around in the kitchen chatting and Bianca started telling me about this book she's reading.

"You should read this book. It will totally help you understand your husband."

Ya, I inhaled sharply when she said it too.

Immediately I got a little defensive; I understand my husband just fine! Then she explained she's reading Wild At Heart and started to tell me about it, so I got the context of her comment a little better.

She's really impressed with this book, so she told us all about it. One of the most remarkably insightful things the author talks about is that God formed Man in the wild (where there just weren't any laundry hampers). Then He created the beauty and relative order/tranquility of the garden, put the man in it, and there He created the woman. That in and of itself spoke volumes to me.

Another night, Jeff took Timothy out to go rock climbing/laser tagging/Buck Hunter-ing, and Bianca and I got food and chatted for hours. More about Wild At Heart, and then about stuff girls talk about - namely everything. Time and time again, though, I was (and I'm embarrassing her now I'm sure) struck by how completely level-headed, and big-picture, and - for lack of a more humble word - wise that woman is. I honestly left their place that night feeling like a better wife already.

So if you're in South Carolina, ladies, schedule some couch time with Bianca.

And Bianca, you need to blog some of this stuff, girl. Seriously.

Bound4Life

I spent the better part of my morning/early afternoon today with Sara and Bound4Life Chicago. I've known about Bound4Life for years, but this was my first siege ever. What an experience.

We were told to meet up with the team at The Prayer Furnace on Elston at 9 AM. At 8:55 there was no one there, but we discovered the parking lot behind the building. We moved the car and waited. For twelve minutes my flesh hoped no one would show so we could just go home, and my spirit bemoaned the idea. We came to stand, and I wanted to stand.

At 9:07 a van pulled in. We met a handful of people - including one young man who used to come to Switch before gas prices got too out of hand. Really nice people, and most of them were teenagers. We chatted about the cause, being in a band, and the Furnace. They're really comfortable people; I felt completely at home.

Just before 10 we got in what I am affectionately referring to as the Life Mobile. That thing is sweet. Jon explained some of the logistics on the way. When we're on "the line," we stand. If you want to kneel or sit that's fine, but back off the line to do it. If someone wants to talk, direct them to the spokesperson - identified by the bright orange vest. We're not here to talk to people; we're here to lay hold of heaven. Oh, and don't touch the fence. As long as we don't block the sidewalk and don't touch the fence, we can't be arrested.

A few minutes later, we pulled up outside a brown, brick building with a parking lot surrounded by an eight-foot, chain-link fence. The parking lot was half-full and license plates confessed that people had come from as far as Wisconsin and Ohio. Several young men waited or slept in and around cars.

On one side of the fenced parking lot stood almost a dozen senior citizens with rosary beads. They chanted in unison and despite the skeptic inside me, I knew that God saw their hearts. We smiled as we passed by to another side of the fence.

The orange vest had been previously covered in strips of red tape with "LIFE" written in bold, black letters. One by one, the first spokesperson for the morning put a piece on our backs, and handed us one for our mouths. Sara and I both having been served, we hesitated long enough to exchange glances. This is it. Here we go.

Tape clinging to my cheeks, I turned to face the fence. Ron was our first spokesperson for the day, and he walked down the line reading scripture and encouraging us that God hears and our prayers move heaven. He did this several times over the next three hours and I honestly don't know if I could have persevered without it.

During the next three hours we were given direction for our prayers. We spent time praying silently, but in unison, for the finances of the institution to dry up, for the hearts of the fathers to be moved with compassion in defense of their children, for forgiveness to grace the hearts of everyone inside, for righteous Supreme Court Justices. We spent time asking God for His heart for the unborn, and every time the church bells across the street tolled the hour, we knew that somewhere in America, another 183 children had been denied the call that God had for their lives. We spent time asking God to move the hearts of His Church for the unborn, and to release a spirit of adoption in us.

During the next three hours, my mouth got really dry. The skin around my mouth started to itch. My feet started to hurt, and my legs got really restless. My back started to get sore and as the sun came out, it got really warm.

During the next three hours we got applause and thanks from passers-by. We also got heckled and sworn at. One father got out of his car right in front of where we were standing and shouted at us, "I don't give a shit; she's got cancer." One man drove by and yelled, "Give it a rest! Don't you have anything better to do?" We glanced at each other down the line: absolutely not.

About two and a half hours into it, we stopped to share communion. Jon talked briefly about what we had and had not witnessed. Statistically speaking, about 40 children will have died inside that very building in the time we stood there. We didn't see any saved at the last minute this time, but "your stand here has been a memorial for those children who died, and heaven sees it."

In three hours, again - statistically speaking - about 560 children in America will die in the womb. With our final 15 minutes, we accepted silence again and counted to 560 with a word for each child. Jon suggested it could be a name, or a one-word prayer, but to get an idea for how many 560 is. I stood, face to the fence, and prayed.

One. Mercy.
Two. Justice.
Three. Forgiveness.
Four. Hope.
Five. Mercy.
Six. Justice.
Seven. Mercy.
Eight. Justice.
Nine. Mercy.
Ten. Justice.

I got to 180 and couldn't take it anymore, so I quit and finished out the hour in prayer.

It was a really intense day, and the three hours actually went by really quickly. I can't wait to get out there again next month. You should come with us.

Myrtle Beach

K. I can finally write about our time in Myrtle Beach because we've surprised both Jeff and Bianca on separate occasions (neither of which I had a camera ready for, which is a total shame).

We visited Jeffy at work yesterday. We actually tried to get him on our way through Conway Friday evening, but we got there 30 minutes after they closed early for the holiday. We drove around to the window and Timothy knocked. The girl on the other side yelled that they're closed and she couldn't open the window.

"DOES JEFF POMS WORK HERE?"

"YES."

"IS HE WORKING TOMORROW?"

"YA. HE SHOULD BE IN BY 8:30."

"K. THANK YOU!"

We managed to get back to Chick-fil-A during the lunch rush on Saturday. He had his back to us, filling orders so we just pointed. The girl at the register turned around, "Mr. Jeff. Mr. Jeff, I think you should turn around, please."

He stared. He stared for a good five to ten seconds. You could see the wheels spinning. "Holy crap!" So we had our first Chick-fil-A, got directions to their church, and swore him to secrecy.

Sometime Saturday evening to Sunday morning, he let on that he had a surprise for Bianca. She said she got suspicious as he thoroughly cleaned the house.

Bianca saw us before we saw her this morning. We parked. We started to walk up to the small crowd standing in front of the church building when out of no where we heard, "Oh my God, oh my God, oh my God!" I felt like the prodigal son coming home: she ran to meet us, we got a lot of hugs, and she almost cried. It was sweet. Surprise accomplished.

Then lunch and more beach. Food and beach is about all we've done so far, and that's okay.

Oh, and church was really good this morning. If you're ever in Myrtle Beach and you're looking to go to church, I can sincerely recommend Seacoast Vineyard. The sermon this morning was really good.

Blogger doesn't want me to upload pics, but you can see them here.

thoughts on obedience

I've been thinking about/dealing with this a lot in the past couple weeks and two things really stand out:

First, I take issue with a phrase we Christians like to throw around. It goes something like, "delayed obedience is disobedience."

There are some situations in which that may be true, but Jesus told a story about two sons. The first refused his father's order, but later regretted his response and did what he was asked. The second son agreed to his father, but never actually did what was asked. Which did his father's will? Of course, the parable is primarily discussing salvation, but which did his father's will? Jesus accepts the first son's delayed obedience.

If the Lord asks me to give an offering, and I refuse but the next day regret my response and give the offering is that disobedience? It's not perfect obedience, and perfect obedience would be the goal (because, like I said, some circumstances do apply and can't be made up for later), but is it disobedience? Meh.

Second, Christians need to think less sometimes.

Now don't hear what I'm not saying. I'm not saying we should be stupid. I'm not saying we should ignore apologetics. I'm not saying we shouldn't study the scripture. I'm not saying we shouldn't know the times. I am saying that when it comes to the issue of obedience, we may - sometimes - need to think less.

Because it seems to get us in a lot of trouble. We question and we wonder and we reason and we don't obey. It's not living by faith.

And the more I thought about this one, the more I thought about Jesus coming back. The bible says that if possible, even the elect will be deceived. It repeatedly calls that day "great" and "terrible." It talks about Jesus coming back to earth as a man to trample His enemies, and warns us to make sure our hearts are so right toward Him that we're not offended. Bottom line: He's always right; everything He does is just and good; our role is to trust and love.

So if we can't obey now (without the reasoning, the questioning, the doubting), when all He asks is for an offering or a simple (albeit counter-cultural) behavior or a spiritual discipline, how will we stand in love, faith and trust - proclaiming His goodness and mercy when the rest of the world is raging against Him?

lessons from the garden, chapter 3

We'll come back to the obedience sermon another day. I'm working that out in myself right now. In the meantime, I was in the garden yesterday.

"Know the Secrets"

If you didn't know anything about gardening, you could probably still do a decent job. You know from pictures and other gardens that you've seen that you need to remove the grass. You know that you should remove the weeds. You know that if it doesn't rain for a couple days, you need to water it, and there are directions on the back of the seed packets for how deep and far apart to plant. Your garden would grow, and you'd reap a good harvest.

It's easier, though, and your harvest is better if you know the secrets. Secrets are learned by doing the same thing for two or three years and figuring out how to do it better, and secrets are learned by gardening with your mother for years.

The same is true of discipleship. You can read your Bible by yourself and pray by yourself, and you'll do just fine. It's easier, though, and your harvest is better if you know the secrets.

Secret #1: Carrots take longer.
There is a patch of dirt in the middle of my garden where two rows of carrot seed has been planted (denoted left by the sticks in the foreground, behind which, nothing seems to be happening). Those are my carrots. Carrots take longer to show up top-side because they're roots; they grow down much further than other plants' roots.

I know that because my mom always grew carrots. If I didn't know that, though, I'd be sorely disappointed at the idea of planting two rows of carrots and not getting a single one to grow. I might dig up those rows and try to re-seed it. I might try to plant something else entirely. I might just stop watering and weeding that section. But I'm not doing any of that, because I know how carrots grow.

I also know that you have to just open your mouth and speak in tongues before it makes any sort of sense. I know that pride often starts as spiritual pride or false humility. I know that a miracle of healing happens instantly, but sometimes a supernatural answer-to-prayer healing takes a couple days. If I didn't know these things, I might ruin something.

Secret #2: It's best to water in the evening.
I thought this was something everyone knows, but I'm constantly driving through neighborhoods on the weekends and watching people water their lawns in the middle of the afternoon.

Watering any sort of plant - especially plants that you want to produce fruit - during a hot, sunny, summer day is a bad idea. As soon as you stop, the water will evaporate really quickly. First of all, all your water was wasted, and secondly, you can scorch your plants and leave them drier and worse off than they were before. Water your garden in the evening, as the sun sets and the air begins to cool, so they can drink deep.

Reading your bible, praying, giving, and all the rest, out of a religious attitude are like watering in full sun. You go through the motions because you know you should. You know that a garden needs water. As a Christian, you know you're supposed to read your bible everyday. If the garden is not ready to receive water, it often ends up worse than it began. If your heart and spirit are not ready to receive God's word or blessing, you become religious.

Secret #3: Puddles are only on the surface.
I used to watch my mom water the garden and warn her to not drown the poor plants. I would stand by as puddles began to form in our footprints left between rows of peas and know for sure that she was killing all of our hard work.

Finally, after watering one evening (because we watered in the evening), my mom guided me to the edge of the garden and told me to pull back a small layer of dirt with my finger. I did, and was shocked to find out that, despite the puddles, the soil only an inch down was completely dry!

Especially when the garden is new, and the plants are first growing, water away. If small puddles start to form, watch them for a minute, and if they soak into the dirt pretty quickly, you're okay. Those little veggies (except the carrots you can't see yet) haven't set very deep roots yet. When they get older and their roots are deeper, you don't need to water as much, but for now they need rich soil.

The seed that is the kingdom of God in my heart needs rich soil, especially the new ones. Things that have been planted for a while - like tithing - don't need a lot of teaching or encouragement because they've got roots and they're producing fruit.

New seed (or seed that was planted years ago but that has never been properly watered so it's never developed much root) need more help. The "slave of all" seed is one that, for me personally, doesn't have a lot of root yet, so I need to water it more and more - even when on the surface it seems like puddles are forming.